Prologue: Blogging is Hard / I'm Scared of the Internet (and also The World)
Welp, I guess it's about time for me to start a some kind of blog.
Truth be told, the idea of making a blog isn't new for me, I remember my middle school me making a Google Blogger site only to be left dormant because I have no idea how to write, despite having an idea of what things I want to put on that blog. And that has been one of my biggest challenge, I have so much on my mind, but I don't know how to put them into words and I'm worry that my wording wouldn't translate well to others who might've read this and come across as too meandering and cringe as the result.
And having such a uneventful life for the most part of my life certainly doesn't help. I don't go outside for non-essential activities very often, there's not a lot of place and thing of interests within my vicinity that is this town and also this pedestrian hell city, and going somewhere farther like Jakarta and South Tangerang for meetups and events can get costly. I don't have a lot of income compared to a lot of my (online) friends, so I've only been outside for joy for so many times. Going out truly on my own still kinda scares me. But even still, I can't wait for the time I live out of my home, it's not great in here as a queer being.
Speaking of scary, man, does the internet scares me. I don't know how the hell that we got to this point of corps and stupid people in it ruining sites and services, especially with the genAI revolution nonsense. And don't get me started with SNS like Twitter which are such fucking toxic hellhole that I'm still wonder how that site is still up. From useless discourses, harassment (campaigns) over petty bullshit, pop activism, misinformations going thru the roof, and the rise of right wing contents and sentiments, it's all been a goddamn mess. That last one in particular really strikes me especially as a queer person, I don't think I've seen this massive rise of queerphobia in my country since like, what, 2016-17? My memory is hazy, forgive me. But anyhow, it's also been surreal to see this shit translate IRL, I guess the internet are both a representation of human's unfiltered, worse self and also a method of transfer for these toxicity. I will never understand anyone who says our life is fine when I've been seeing my friends getting judged and mistreated just because they're queer.
When I ask for a better internet, I also wish for a better world with better peoples who can treat me and my friends like regular humans and not a parasite, an alien, who come here to hijack your livelihood. That's our govs and oligarchs job and we should fight them instead of us for being different.
Damn, that's already quite the dump, sorry about that. Anyway, I don't know how much I'll write on here. I have some ideas of what I want to talk about here that wouldn't come across well as threads or multi-image post. As much as I love cohost (RIP) and how the people who made it basically created Tumblr but without all the bullshit culture that site build, cultivate, and spread on other SNS like Twitter and TikTok, reading longer post on that platform gets a bit iffy for me, especially for me who's surfing the web on my phone instead of this perpetually aging (and dying) laptop. I don't want a mini-blog or a micro-blog, I want a real, honest to god blog.
But yeah, ideas. I want to talk about the CDs and cassette I have, I love physical medias and there are many parts about packaging music this way that gives me joy (seeing the arts printed, the booklets, etc.). I still can't stop thinking about Look Back and how that movie changed me, especially how that being my first movie I've watched on cinema with my friends. When Comic Frontier event is done (basically our own Comiket), I want to make a recap post about that, too, maybe show some pics.
I have a lot to say but I can't quite put it down onto words and I'm hoping to change that after this preamble. Don't take that as a promise though, cause who knows, maybe this'll be my only post on here - well maybe it won't, but either way, I'm glad that I got my start here. And I think you should make a blog too if you haven't. I can think some people in my life that can make a good use of it.
Hope you all have a great day and I'll see you another time, where ever it might be.